I wasn't born or raised in a Christian family or any other religon in my culture. I did have to fight for my belief throughout my jouney. Though it was a challenge, I think the obstacles in our lives make our faith stronger. It's like the wrapping paper from the gift, when you finally unwrapped you will see the joy of God.
My story begins here: I was introduced to Christianity when I was 10. I was interested in knowing who God was and was encouraged to get baptized and so I did. I then decided to give my life to God and started to believe His teachings. I was unaware of what I was doing and at such a young age, I thought that what I was taught was biblically correct. Although I believed, the laying of my foundations weren't stable.
This journey had begun and I found it extremely hard to study His word. What made it more difficult was that I had no support from the church that had introduced me to God. The very first traditional Chinese bible I was reading was very hard for me to understand. With no help from leaders, this then affected my connection with God.
During my high school years, my parents decided to focus on their company overseas and left me alone to carry on with secondary education. I felt so depressed every day, I lost my motivation to study and all aspects of my life. My faith started to crumble. I became rebellious towards my parents, school and people. I began to seek comfort from alcohol, drugs and partying. This was to help paralyze myself from the emotions I was feeling. I wouldn't need to deal with the loneliness and frustration in my life. However, it didn’t last long.
God took me back. He allowed me to see that I cannot fix myself in my ways anymore. One time, a family friend approached me. I wasn’t sure why but I had started to share my struggles with her and I asked for her advice. I said to her, “I want to put God first in my life now, can you tell me how?”. She gave me a simple answer, "go home and pray." That night I decided to pray. I knelt down in front of my bed and suddenly the Holy Spirit began to lead me to repentance and I wept myself to God and asked Him for His forgiveness. I asked Him to help me to move on from this old life. "Father God I want to give up all kinds of addiction. Please give me a new life. I want to put you first in my life. Please help me understand my purpose."
I came to faith again, received salvation and was then baptised. I was followed up by leaders in the ENAC church, who helped me understand step by step what it meant to be a disciple and my foundations are stable now.
From that prayer I felt so loved from God. To this day, I am unable to find the right words to describe the feeling. I know that I felt so much joy and peace in my heart, so much that I never want to let go of God. I want to continue this journey with Him forever.